okay here goes, last year I met this guy through a friend of mine who's 13 years older than me and very picky about the people he associates with. or so they say. I mean if they bore him or don't interest him, he won't talk to them. That's what I heard from various sources. He was always very nice to me and the people around him and we became pretty good aquaintances or friends. We seemed to have excellent telepathy and we worked together for a while. Then I was pulled off the project and he's doing it with someone else now, someone who has more experience than me which is fair enough. I am now working on something else which is losely tied into what he's doing so that technically I wouldn't need his help at all. The last time we spoke and I asked him if I could contact him if I had any questions, he said that he wouldn't be here for a while due to the project he is now working on. So I told him that I would contact him by phone or via email. He didn't really respond but that was on the phone and he wasn't feeling well. I don't want to lose touch with him but I don't want to come across as some demented stalker. He's a pretty high profile person where this project is concerned and I didn't want him to think I was using his name and standing to get ahead. When I told him that his response made it clear that he understood and didn't think so and he gave me advice on where to go with the project I am now working on. I know he's terribly busy but what I'd like to know is this; is he just telling me to get lost in a more or less 'nice' way or is it that he really is ver busy and that was just his way of telling me that if I don't hear from him that's the reason why? And what should I do as I don't want to lose touch with him. He was diagnosed with depression and I would really like to help him in that as well as he's helped me out a lot, sometimes without even knowing it.

Cheers,
Chris

I like matters of the heart.. <img src="tongue.gif" border="0">
It sounds that you and he have only a work-related friendship. If he's busy with projects and dealing with some depression, it sounds like his mind is full. He probably doesn't realise you're interested in getting to know him in more than just work issues. He might also realise he should deal with his depression, too. I would suggest, in my humble opinion, letting him know you're there if he ever needs to talk. As a friend. Maybe ask him one day if he wants to take a break and get away. Tell him you feel the need to.
Invite him on a picnic or something. Outside with nature, good food, and a quiet place, you'll probably find him wanting to share thoughts with you.. good luck!

Hi Chris <img src="smile.gif" border="0"> IMO if he is interested he would MAKE the time in his busy schedule for you. Somehow, someway he would do this. Simply put... If someone makes you feel good you MAKE the time to be with them...I do <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0"> <img src="wink.gif" border="0"> Lots of luck to you <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

strange, a picknick was what I was thinking of as well.

Problem is *I* don't even know if it's a matter of the heart or not. I know that I want to help him but I'm not sure if there isn't a bit of love or rather being in love involved as well. Guess it looks that way.

Thanks for the advice though to both of you. I'll have to get all my brave reserves together ... but hey, at least I'll know where I stand.


Chris