What are some of the dumb expressions that you hear every now and then? A few I've heard:

"More fun than a clown on fire"

"Sweeter than molasses on a Moon Pie"

"Tougher than woodpecker lips"

"About as sharp as a bag of wet mice"

H*rnier than a three p*ckered billy goat.

Looks like somebody feel out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down.


The cheese slid off his cracker.

More fun than a clown on fire"

DUMB??!! Thats great!!!I'm gonna use that one in everyday life!!!

How about....

"A couple sandwiches short of a picnic"

"A couple miles,as the crow flies"(what the hell does that mean anyway)

"As dumb as a box of rocks"

"It's like comparing apples to oranges"(This one has always annoyed me for some reason)

Hotter than a witches t*t.....Sorry TY <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

One fruit loop shy of a full bowl.

Too much yardage between the goal posts.

Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.

"nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs"

"nervous as a whore in church"

"faster than a raped ape"

"not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer"

"so ugly that he'd make a freight train take a dirt road"

One fry short of a happy meal

*One brick shy of a full load
*One scallop short of a seafood platter
*All the sex appeal of a wet paper bag
*Can't count his balls and get the same answer twice
*Couldn't get laid in a monkey whorehouse with a sack of bananas
*If brains were chocolate, he wouldn't have enough for an M&M
*If he had half a brain, his ass would be lopsided
*Nutty as a fruitcake
*So dumb, blondes tell jokes about her
*So stupid, mind readers charge her half price

"We got covered like a fat women on a milkin' stool"

"Cool as a cucumber".

Just how cool can a vegetable be? (Short of you, Silverado... <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0"> )

"Sweatin' like a whore on nickel night"
<img src="rolleyes.gif" border="0">

Originally posted by Not Man:
<STRONG>Hotter than a witches t*t.....Sorry TY <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">
</STRONG>

My brother used to say Hotter than a witches t*t in hell!
My father-in-law used something about an old cow pissin' on a flat rock (??)
You're about as smart as a pound of wet liver (??) <img src="rolleyes.gif" border="0">

"I'm sweating like a whore in church."

-"Lean And Mean"
-"Bada-Boom, Bada-Bing"

My definition of dumb expressions is "Should be banned from the English Language".

Can't post much more at the moment. I'll check in when I'm home from school.

Sincerely,

John "outofplacechild" Kilduff

"cool as hell" last I heard Hell wasn't very cool.
"Life is like a box of chocolates" OK I liked Forrest Gump as much as the next person but shut up with this one already.
"pissing razors" what?
"Don't worry be happy" might as well kill me now.

Originally posted by djdaffy1227:
[QB"pissing razors" what?
[/QB]


If you've ever had a UTI (urinary tract infection) You know
exactly what this phrase means! <img src="wink.gif" border="0">

Sorry, I know UTI's aren't funny but for some reason I thought that your response was funny. lol

I sat here & LMAO!!! You guys have all the good ones covered <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

Come on Blazie you can come up with something can't you? <img src="smile.gif" border="0">

Very funny guys! <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0"> I had a list of Aussie ones but can't find it! <img src="mad.gif" border="0"> I'll have another look later. We do have:
Done like a dog's dinner.
A kangaroo loose in the top paddock.
Stone the flamin' crows.
Fair crack of the whip. *crack, ouch!*

Really Not Man, I think I have Dain Bramage cause I'm drawing a blank <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

Hey, *Drawing a blank* Well I tried <img src="rolleyes.gif" border="0"> <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

Originally posted by djdaffy1227:
<STRONG>Sorry, I know UTI's aren't funny but for some reason I thought that your response was funny. lol</STRONG>

Are you laughing at my pain DJ??? <img src="wink.gif" border="0"> j/k...I am not suffering from that at this moment! Glad I brought humor to your life! <img src="rolleyes.gif" border="0">

Dawn,
I'm a democrat. I feel your pain.

Originally posted by djdaffy1227:
<STRONG>I'm a democrat.</STRONG>

I just don't know what to say, DJ, I guess all I can say is I hope you get better, the pain must be unbearable. Have you seen a doctor about this? <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

Well OK Blazie I will let you pass this time. <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

My father-in-law says:
"His brain would rattle in an ant's a$$ like a b.b. in a box car." (Love that one, Dad)
My husband says:
"Colder than a witch's t*t in a brass bra."
I say:
"Hotter than the devil's left n*t."

Here's one that they always say about me at work about my high sales... "She could sell heaters in hell!"

how about "No $hit Sherlock!"
-"Move it or Lose it"

From Tommyboy......"He could sell a ketchup popsicle to a woman wearing white gloves."

I used to know bunches of these but my mind has went blank. Lots of them I heard from my parents.

Dug these up from an old e-mail.....

Pay Check (I'm not paying, I'm recieving)
F*ck You (Just what exactly does that mean?)
Gun Control (It isn't even a possibility)
Rock & Roll (That could hurt)
Close Shave (As oppossed to what...a far shave??)
Suit Case (Then why do I put my suit in a garment bag?)
Flash Light (But it stays on!)
Super Model (Does that come with a cape?)
Drive way (I park my car here)

You can pick up a lot of them by watching that show 'Weakest Link' too....she mentions a bunch on there ridiculing the contestants <img src="biggrin.gif" border="0">

Some good one's guys.

A popular UK expression used by parents to children:

'If you fall off that wall and break both your legs, don't come running to me..'

:lol:

Cuter than a speckled pup. *ahuck ahuck* :rolleyes:

"Smoother than a baby's bottom"
"Like corn through a goat!"
"