stlkev70
10-21-04, 05:25 PM
Where Are They Now?
Spuds MacKenzie
By Christian Bladt
In happier times, Spuds was always surrounded by plenty of babes and plenty of Bud Light.
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A precocious bull terrier surrounded by three bikini-clad blondes in a hot tub. A dog that can not only do a keg stand, but pee while he does it. His unparalleled ability in water-skiing, and skateboarding and raucous drum solos all came to typify the official spokes-dog for Bud Light: Spuds MacKenzie, The Ultimate Party Animal.
But where is he now?
After appearing in a commercial for Bud Light during Superbowl XXII, Spuds MacKenzie was on the fast track to fame and fortune. His degree of popularity hadn't been experienced by a Canine-American in over a decade. In a 1987 interview with Time Magazine, MacKenzie reflected on those who came before him." Lassie really opened a lot of doors for us, and, without bitches like her and Benji, I don't think that people would have accepted a dog out for good times who parties in a hot tub filled with half-naked broads." Over the course of the next two years, MacKenzie realized more and more that his party animal act was just that: an act. And so, in 1989, Spuds did the unthinkable, and walked away from it all.
After dozens of commercials, and millions of dollars from key chain, mug and T-shirt sales, MacKenzie found himself humping the lap of luxury, but, at the same time experiencing a very real crisis of faith. The fact that all of his fame and fortune came at the expense of enticing kids to drink beer didn't sit well with him. He still enjoyed a good party, and the sweet taste of an ice cold Bud Light, how it picks you up, yet never slows you down. But, over time, he became increasingly disturbed by the fact that the thing that he loved so much was so bad for so many people.
Particularly disturbing was that his endorsement was specifically geared towards bringing in a younger audience, who might not have been attracted to drinking beer had it not been for a free-wheeling doggy constantly on the lookout for beer-fueled mayhem. The final straw came when MacKenzie stumbled across a Budweiser prototype for "Shots and Keggers", an updated version of long-time childhood favorite "Shoots and Ladders". Seeing that the next stage was to bring in even younger drinkers, MacKenzie went into seclusion.
Close friend Joe Camel describes this period as a truly emotional time for MacKenzie. "He was really torn up over the whole thing. He was down to maybe like a case and a half of Bud a day, and he really didn't want to hang out with the Budweiser babes anymore. He even managed to resist the cool, smooth menthol flavor of new Camel Ultra Lite 100's."
"He just dropped out of society for awhile," continued Camel, "After weeks of his not returning my phone calls, I went to his house. I let myself in – or rather the cleaning lady let me in after I pleasured her with my nose. I couldn't believe what I saw when I got there. The place was a mess. The newspapers on the floor hadn't been changed in weeks, and he hadn't shed any of his fur in quite some time. When I saw him I knew that he was in trouble. He was passed out next to a party keg of O'Doul's' Non-alcoholic beer." The Original Party Animal had drank himself sober.
In order to make Spuds more popular among even younger children, this toy was enclosed in millions of McDonald's Happy Meals.
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Camel quickly rushed MacKenzie to a rehabilitation center in Beverly Hills. While detained in that facility, MacKenzie received life-changing news about his close friend, Alex, whose far less lucrative endorsement deal with Stroh's had gotten him a DeVito-esque degree of fame. Alex had been on a night-long drinking binge with some friends, and was driving home Domino's pizza spokesperson the Noid who had foolishly mixed alcohol with his prescription anti-depressants, the Energizer Bunny in a heroin coma, and a PCP-tweaked Mayor McCheese. Alex was momentarily distracted by his own wagging tail, and veered into oncoming traffic, never even noticing the Mack Truck that plowed into them. The only survivor of the accident was the Noid, who as a result of the accident lost the use of the right side of his body, and found himself overtaken by an insatiable craving for Papa John's Pizza.
MacKenzie realized that he would meet the same fate if he did not change his ways. Several months later, after being released with a clean bill of health, Spuds met with the Noid to learn more about Alex's final days. Noid explained that although the accident crippled his body, it helped to enrich his spirit. He had become a Muslim, and urged MacKenzie to read the Koran. Spuds did so, and found what he had been looking for. Within days, he had renounced alcohol once and for all, donated his excessive wealth to numerous charities, and stopped humping the legs of total strangers.
Over the course of the next several months, Spuds MacKenzie begun meeting with the Rev. Louis Farrakhan and other leaders of the Nation of Islam. This not only brought him closer to his new faith, but also put him in touch with his African heritage. Spuds responded by shedding the white slave name given to him by his Irish Masters, and he began calling himself Kamal Shaka-Spudz.
Along with his new persona came a new sense of maturity and added responsibility. In 1994, MacKenzie embarked on a mission to encourage kids to stay in school and not enjoy the full body taste of Ice Cold Budweiser until their 21st birthday. After all, it was his celebrity that led a generation of junior-high kids to drop out of school and start drinking. Today, feeling fulfilled for the first time in his life, he spends his creative energies trying to make life better for underprivileged pups, making sure that they stay out of the pound
Spuds MacKenzie
By Christian Bladt
In happier times, Spuds was always surrounded by plenty of babes and plenty of Bud Light.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A precocious bull terrier surrounded by three bikini-clad blondes in a hot tub. A dog that can not only do a keg stand, but pee while he does it. His unparalleled ability in water-skiing, and skateboarding and raucous drum solos all came to typify the official spokes-dog for Bud Light: Spuds MacKenzie, The Ultimate Party Animal.
But where is he now?
After appearing in a commercial for Bud Light during Superbowl XXII, Spuds MacKenzie was on the fast track to fame and fortune. His degree of popularity hadn't been experienced by a Canine-American in over a decade. In a 1987 interview with Time Magazine, MacKenzie reflected on those who came before him." Lassie really opened a lot of doors for us, and, without bitches like her and Benji, I don't think that people would have accepted a dog out for good times who parties in a hot tub filled with half-naked broads." Over the course of the next two years, MacKenzie realized more and more that his party animal act was just that: an act. And so, in 1989, Spuds did the unthinkable, and walked away from it all.
After dozens of commercials, and millions of dollars from key chain, mug and T-shirt sales, MacKenzie found himself humping the lap of luxury, but, at the same time experiencing a very real crisis of faith. The fact that all of his fame and fortune came at the expense of enticing kids to drink beer didn't sit well with him. He still enjoyed a good party, and the sweet taste of an ice cold Bud Light, how it picks you up, yet never slows you down. But, over time, he became increasingly disturbed by the fact that the thing that he loved so much was so bad for so many people.
Particularly disturbing was that his endorsement was specifically geared towards bringing in a younger audience, who might not have been attracted to drinking beer had it not been for a free-wheeling doggy constantly on the lookout for beer-fueled mayhem. The final straw came when MacKenzie stumbled across a Budweiser prototype for "Shots and Keggers", an updated version of long-time childhood favorite "Shoots and Ladders". Seeing that the next stage was to bring in even younger drinkers, MacKenzie went into seclusion.
Close friend Joe Camel describes this period as a truly emotional time for MacKenzie. "He was really torn up over the whole thing. He was down to maybe like a case and a half of Bud a day, and he really didn't want to hang out with the Budweiser babes anymore. He even managed to resist the cool, smooth menthol flavor of new Camel Ultra Lite 100's."
"He just dropped out of society for awhile," continued Camel, "After weeks of his not returning my phone calls, I went to his house. I let myself in – or rather the cleaning lady let me in after I pleasured her with my nose. I couldn't believe what I saw when I got there. The place was a mess. The newspapers on the floor hadn't been changed in weeks, and he hadn't shed any of his fur in quite some time. When I saw him I knew that he was in trouble. He was passed out next to a party keg of O'Doul's' Non-alcoholic beer." The Original Party Animal had drank himself sober.
In order to make Spuds more popular among even younger children, this toy was enclosed in millions of McDonald's Happy Meals.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Camel quickly rushed MacKenzie to a rehabilitation center in Beverly Hills. While detained in that facility, MacKenzie received life-changing news about his close friend, Alex, whose far less lucrative endorsement deal with Stroh's had gotten him a DeVito-esque degree of fame. Alex had been on a night-long drinking binge with some friends, and was driving home Domino's pizza spokesperson the Noid who had foolishly mixed alcohol with his prescription anti-depressants, the Energizer Bunny in a heroin coma, and a PCP-tweaked Mayor McCheese. Alex was momentarily distracted by his own wagging tail, and veered into oncoming traffic, never even noticing the Mack Truck that plowed into them. The only survivor of the accident was the Noid, who as a result of the accident lost the use of the right side of his body, and found himself overtaken by an insatiable craving for Papa John's Pizza.
MacKenzie realized that he would meet the same fate if he did not change his ways. Several months later, after being released with a clean bill of health, Spuds met with the Noid to learn more about Alex's final days. Noid explained that although the accident crippled his body, it helped to enrich his spirit. He had become a Muslim, and urged MacKenzie to read the Koran. Spuds did so, and found what he had been looking for. Within days, he had renounced alcohol once and for all, donated his excessive wealth to numerous charities, and stopped humping the legs of total strangers.
Over the course of the next several months, Spuds MacKenzie begun meeting with the Rev. Louis Farrakhan and other leaders of the Nation of Islam. This not only brought him closer to his new faith, but also put him in touch with his African heritage. Spuds responded by shedding the white slave name given to him by his Irish Masters, and he began calling himself Kamal Shaka-Spudz.
Along with his new persona came a new sense of maturity and added responsibility. In 1994, MacKenzie embarked on a mission to encourage kids to stay in school and not enjoy the full body taste of Ice Cold Budweiser until their 21st birthday. After all, it was his celebrity that led a generation of junior-high kids to drop out of school and start drinking. Today, feeling fulfilled for the first time in his life, he spends his creative energies trying to make life better for underprivileged pups, making sure that they stay out of the pound